Submission seems to be a hot topic with many of you ladies. I appreciate all of your viewpoints, opinions and life experiences more than you know. Thank you so much for helping me.
I figure I owe you an update on how my struggle with submission is going :)
First, hubby and I sat down (at my request) to have a talk. It did NOT go well. I was cool, calm and collected, and he was not. Somehow, he felt that I was attacking him. He went completely in the opposite direction, saying that the house and Jaxson were absolutely my job, and how dare I ask him to do anything other than work and provide for this family. Obviously, that did not sit well with me, because I work and provide an equal part to this family as well. BUT - I said fine, I will not expect that of you, but I have been holding up my end of the respect bargain for over 2 months, and I don't feel that I am getting the love and appreciation from you that I need as encouragement to keep going, because it is a struggle for me. His response (keep in mind this was out of anger), was well, you don't always get what you want so you are going to have to settle for what I give you. Ouch. So, at this point, I was crying and done. And hurt.
So, we hardly spoke for two days. And I was so sad. I wasn't angry at him, just hurt and sad, and feeling like I didn't know him at all.
So, Saturday night, our anniversary celebration came, and I was still very upset but trying to put on a happy face. Things were not right and he knew it.
So, after a few uncomfortable minutes at dinner, he brought up the conversation again. He didn't exactly apologize, but he did say that he didn't mean what he said and that he didn't really believe that. He is going to help more and appreciates my efforts to be respectful. We both agreed that we just needed to relax a little and that things would go better. And, he has been so incredibly helpful since then. He has gotten up each morning and helped with Jaxson while I finish getting ready, and gotten the house ready in the mornings. I feel so thankful that he has taken on more of those responsibilities. It makes me love him and respect him even more.
So, things are much better right now. I still struggle with being submissive and respectful, but I am working on it. And, hubby is working on helping me.
I can't thank you all enough for your advice and support, and most importantly your prayers. Thank you for helping me through this!